For example you can prioritise a daily talking time with your husband when you share how each of you are doing.
This should be time you have alone perhaps when the children are in bed and to make sure it is distraction free (with the computer and TV turned off).
Though it may be painful, the fact that you have started talking about issues is a good sign.
To continue with this process you may wish to seek marriage counselling ( relationshipsireland.com, accord.ie).
It wouldn’t have been as bad if he was just accessing porn, as I know men do this, but the fact that he was talking to other people has really disgusted me.